12 February 2014

My Pity Party

The Question .... "What clues you into the fact that you are relying on your own strength in your battles with food (or any other struggle)?"

**Edited** I didn't like what I wrote so I'm starting over.

I like what Lysa says about a pity party.  However, after I have had some time to think about what my clues are I have a better answer.

One day not long ago, I had "one of those days" where I had left my Bible home. I have this handy dandy New Living Translation that IS perfect to pack around. At work, I'm a custodian and I have to wear a smock. The smock has BIG pockets and I slide that handheld, large pocket sized Bible down in it. That way I always have God's Word with me.  When on break of any kind (including potty break), I can read it. I don't always read it but CAN read it. Just knowing it's within reach settles the ole brain. So, my Bible was at home.  It was also a day when EVERY minute felt like it was consumed by "other things".  Name it! I bet it was distracting me, bidding for my attention. I didn't pray as much.  By the end of the day, I was feeling "mean".  Tired. Exhausted. All I wanted to do was go home and go to bed and forget the day had existed.  That did NOT happen!

Long story short, I blew up at my son! Monster Mom came out with a vengeance! Should he have been disciplined? Yes. Should I have acted the way I acted? No.

I was running on empty. I hadn't taken time with God most of the day.  I did my morning prayers and devotional but that was it! When you think about it, we are told to eat 3 healthy meals a day and have 2 or 3 healthy snacks in between. What makes us think we can make it all day on just ONE meal with our God?  If we are suppose to eat (healthy) through out the day to keep our physical strength up, shouldn't we be feasting on God's Word and God's Presence through out the day so we are NOT relying on our own strength to carry us through out the day?

My signs are: frustration, irritability, lack of control of the tongue.  I can have pit parties but when I really step back and look at how I respond on a day when I haven't spent time, that precious time with my Savior and LORD, I see where things "get on my nerves" more ... I can see my tolerance level is a lot lower ... I can see how my tongue lashes out at people closest to me.  These are ALL signs that I have relied on my own strength through out the day ... PERIOD. I don't care if it is food choices, shopping choices, name it ... I've lived on my own strength for that day and it has WORE me out!

When it comes to food, I think I'm past the pity party stage. I don't care there are skinnier women out there.  The only thing that bothers me is the stupid commercials for ChristianMingle.com and Eharmony.com.  They always use these slimmer men and women for the ads.  Instead of having a pity party like I use to, I now get a little upset.  Why can't they show the plus size woman or man finding her/his match?  Not only that ... how can it be a successful match until they've been married 10 to 15 years at least? Most first time marriages end after 7 years. .... Oh, wait ... That's ANOTHER blog! And as you can see ... that is how Vivian ends up relying on her own strength instead of focusing on Jesus and what He wants me to do NOT focusing on how lame those commercials are.  It's THAT fast folks! The second we take our eyes off Jesus and put our focus on something else, we begin relying on our strength and that will wear us out each time.    

12 comments:

  1. Vivian, love your honesty as always! You are so right about how we need just as many or more "God Meals" as anything else!! Also love your humor, lol You always make my heart smile with your stories. Thank you for sharing your heart with us all~ Cindy M. OBS Small Group Leader

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    1. Thanks for stopping by my wonderful leader!

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  2. I LOVE this Vivian! So so true & I love how you said if we need to eat meals & snacks thoughout the day to maintain our health why shouldn't we need to take in God & His word to maintain our spiritual health. Man, that is some good stuff right there. I'm like you & can see the difference in myself whe I haven't done that through the day. You've truly spoken to my heart this morning....thank you so much for sharing!

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    1. Thank you for visiting! It's amazing what God will show us when we are willing to look. I use to wonder "Why am I like this?" Then over the past year God has been showing me it is due to my lack of time with Him.

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  3. Vivian, this is so familiar. Thank you for sharing.

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    1. Thank you for visiting!

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  4. I love this:
    "It's THAT fast folks! The second we take our eyes off Jesus and put our focus on something else, we begin relying on our strength and that will wear us out each time."
    There is so much truth in that statement.
    Great post, thanks for sharing.

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    1. I'm glad that spoke to you! The funny thing is ... I was getting side tracked and I think God allowed for that ot happen on purpose just to show how quick we can become distracted and lose focus.

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  5. So true - "The second we take our eyes off Jesus and put our focus on something else, we begin relying on our strength and that will wear us out each time" - This reminds me of when Peter walked on the water, whilst he was focusing on Jesus he was fine, as soon as he took his eyes of Jesus then he began to sink. Thank you for this reminder to continually focus on Jesus. Blessings, Fiona (group 50)

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    1. I LOVE Peter jumping in the water! That's one of my FAVORITE stories! There are several lessons in that story including the one we are discussing ... keep our eyes on Jesus and not the waves!

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  6. I needed this...

    I don't spend the time with Him that I should and run to other things instead.

    And with my daughter being really sick this past week its been tough/stressful... and I have definetly not handled things too well.

    Thanks for sharing !!

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    1. I can relate to the sick child. It makes it harder to sit down in that special quiet place to spend time with God. I've had my great-nephew for almost 2 weeks; he's 2 years old. I had forgotten how much work a toddler can be! Mine are 14 and 13! It's been a little more taxing in trying to steal moments with God. I know if I don't, I might bite someone's head off (anyone ... no one in particular! LOL)

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